December 31

Diana Fletcher wishes us a Happy New Year and advises us to "go for it".


Making at least ten New Year's resolutions is definitely on my to do list today.  This year, I am going to keep them someplace where I can see them so I don't forget about them.  I am also going to not make my goals too outrageous because it is pretty easy to set yourself up for failure that way.  I am going to have a really fun night tonight and then I am going to welcome the New Year with open arms.  Even if 2012 might be the end of the world as we know it.
AMANDA

One of my New Year's resolution this year is to update our 1001 Albums blog every day. How do you like that, Amanda? :) I always get really sad at the end of the year for some reason. I like to think that I am always open to change, so that isn't it. Maybe I am sad because I cannot believe how fast another year has gone by. I am also kind of upset due to relationship issues. And I hate that, because I am letting a guy ruin my New Years Eve. But as I am writing this post, I am being comforted by an amazing friend.

xx Brie

December 30

Laugh.


So while I write this post, I am watching the movie The Grapes of Wrath.  If you have ever read the book or seen the movie, you know that it is not exactly laugh out loud funny.  Thankfully, I went out to lunch with my brother and sister today (go to Noodles and Company and get the buttered noodles; you won't be sorry) so I have already done some hard laughing.  I would recommend Office Space, Horrible Bosses, First Wives Club, or Bridesmaids if you want to do some hard laughing.
AMANDA

Amanda and I, along with our friends Rachel (also Amanda's sister) and Mara, watched Office Space tonight. It was super funny, and because all four of us were together, we laughed a lot. I won't mention any names, but one of us took some perscription medication that made her kind of loopy, which was hilarious. I was crying because I was laughing so hard. I would post a video, but mine are never as funny as Amandas.

xx Brie

December 29

Make a list of 25 joyful feelings, items, or activities.

Oops.  I accidentally skipped this one a couple of days ago and only just realized it now.  Let's repair the damage with...

MY LIST

1. Reading

2. Watching movies

3. Listening to music

4. Writing

5. Seeing my friends and family

6. My chinchilla

7. Goat cheese (this deserves a place; I don't care what anyone says:))

8. Soda

9. Cake

10. St. James Park

11. Waking up on a weekend

12. Ewan McGregor

13. Opening a new book

14.When a movie starts and all the production companies are shown

15. Taking a walk in the night

16. The start of a weekend

17. Walking into a book store

18. The Beatles

19. Watching Seinfeld, Friends, or Family Guy

20. Meeting a funny, intelligent guy

21. Eating chocolate

22. Reaching a landmark in my 1001 journeys

23. Laughing

24. A pub in England

25. Capri, Italy

Wow, 25 is a lot.

AMANDA

Okay, I am going to make my list without looking at Amandas, so if there are repeats, please don't judge. :)
1. Being with my friends
2. Being with my boyfriend
3. Being with my family
4. Being around animals
5. Singing
6. Laughing/smiling
7. Standing outside in the rain
8. Music
9. Walking on the beach at night
10. A certain necklace that was given to me by someone very special
11. My blanket I've had since I was born
12. Going to museums
13. Hanging out at a library
14. Being honest
15. Shopping!
16. Reading
17. Sleeping in
18. Flemish Giant Rabbits (they exist! Look them up!)
19. Watching movies
20. Holding hands
21. Listening to rain
22. Desserts/sweets
23. Ewan McGregor's smile (as previously featured on this blog)
24. A nice, hot cup of tea
25. Traveling

xx Brie

December 28

Is there someone you know who is in need?  Don't forget.


I have mentioned this in previous posts but my grandfather died last month.  I know my grandmother is having a really difficult time with it.  I am going to write her a letter today to remind that if she needs to talk, I am here.  I think it is really important not to forget about others especially during this time of year.
AMANDA

That is such a sweet idea, Amanda. I keep in contact with all of my close friends and relatives, so I probably won't write any letters today. My friends and I usually call each other right away when something big happens, but I will make an extra effort to let them know that I am here for them at all times.

Here are a few quotes I came across recently and wanted to share:

Strange how people who suffer together have stronger connections than those who are most constant. -Bob Dylan

If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. -Dr. Wayne Dyer

The second quote, I thought, really captures one of the goals of this blog. It is all about changing the way we percieve things to live a more positive life.

xx Brie

December 27

Have a pajama day.


I actually got a pair of comfy pajamas for Christmas.  I am wearing them right now and let me tell you, I am competing with chinchillas right now for the Softest Creature award.  I love having pajama days.  This doesn't necessarily mean you don't get anything done.  I have been puttering around the house and completing chores all day.  Enjoy!
AMANDA

I got pajamas for Christmas, too! :) I have pajama days sometimes when I have a lot of work to do. As soon as I get home, I will put on my pajamas. Hey, if I have a lot of work to do, I might as well be comfortable while doing it!

xx Brie

December 26

Get more sleep.


I have been getting a lot more sleep over the holidays but usually I get up at 6:00.  I don't really have a huge problem with us.  I like having long days.  I think it is important to listen to your body.  Don't leave twenty things to do at 10:00 when your body may be trying to tell you that it is time for rest.  I think it is all about balance and everyone is different.
AMANDA

I agree that everyone is different. I need about nine hours of sleep per night to feel completely rested. I also know that I can over sleep and be groggy the rest of the day. Usually, I get about six or seven hours of sleep per night when I am not on holiday. Don't try to do too much during the holidays. Your body needs time to rest and recover. This time of year isn't to add stress , it is a time for rest and relaxation.

xx Brie

December 25

Merry Christmas!  Enjoy.


I am having such a good day!  My family and I have been playing TV Scene It, charades (me and my sister kick ass), and just enjoying each other's company.  I also got some great gifts including gift cards, a Beatles picture, and some great movies.  It has been a great day and I think I really enjoyed to the fullest.  CHECK!
AMANDA

I am experiencing a case of the 'Christmas is over' blues. :(  Today was awesome, though. Everyone loved the presents I bought them, and I recieved some amazing things, too. I got a lot of books and movies. I am completely sincere when I say this: I would trade all of the gifts in the world for time with my family. Honestly, I would. I had so much fun with them today that I forgot all about the gifts I had recieved. I hope everyone else had a wonderful holiday.

xx Brie

December 24

Find something to anticipate.  It can be mundane or simple.


MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE!

I know what I am looking forward to: Christmas tomorrow!  My family is not religious but we do enjoy Christmas.  I am excited to eat indecent amounts of chocolate, see my family, and give and receive presents.  If you don't celebrate Christmas, I think you can still follow the latter part of the advice.  I look forward to writing these posts or watching movies.  Though these tasks may seem mundane, I have a lot of fun with them and look forward to them often.
AMANDA

I know it may sound really cliche, but I like to give gifts more than I like to recieve them. I think I chose some very good gifts this year, and I cannot wait to see everyone's faces when they open my presents! I love spending time with my family, because we always have such a fun time every time we are together. I know I will be laughing a lot tomorrow. When it isn't the holiday season, I look forward to listening to great music and spending time with my friends. Another one of my favorite things to do is go to an art museum. I can spend hours wandering through the long hallways, and I find it very theraputic. It removes me from the stress of my every day life and clears my mind. If you celebrate, enjoy your Christmas!!!

xx Brie

December 23

Don't be a wet blanket or a killjoy.  Protect your dreams from these people.


I sometimes crush people's dreams.  Hell, me and my friend Mara do it all the time.  We don't do it on purpose but the two of us usually think everything through and assume the worst. It is pretty natural for us to ruin people's dreams just by asking questions.  I agree that you should protect your dreams from us killjoys, but make sure you can also defend it.  A conversation about logistics should not be enough to ruin your dream.  If you can't aptly defend it than you may want to rethink your game plan.  Believe me, we wet blankets lurk everywhere.  Be prepared!
AMANDA

Amanda has over dramatized that. She really isn't like that. She is simply a realist. When I first began my current relationship and told one of my family members about it, said family member told me something to the effect of "Well, just so you know, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world if you broke up". We had just gotten together. Way to put a damper on my newfound love. I didn't listen to that person, of course, and I am still with him. To address Amanda's advice, "if you can't aptly defend it than you may want to rethink your game plan", my defense was that we compliment each other. I mean, it wasn't the strongest defense, but it is really hard to explain my feelings sometimes. And I don't think "I really like him" would be a very solid defense, either. Trust in yourself and follow your intuition. It's gotten me where I am today. But also ask your close friends for advice often, because the different perspectives can help you to make smarter decisions.

xx Brie

December 22

Make a list of things you could do if money wasn't a problem.  Try to think of ways you could make the dream happen without the cash.


1. Live in London
2. TRAVEL!
3. Get started as a producer in Hollywood
4. Be a private detective
5. Stay in a castle
AMANDA

1. Have a ridiculous amount of clothes
2. Live in France and New York
3. Start an organization that helps people in Third World countries
4. Travel, without working (meaning I wouldn't have a job, and I would just travel around not worrying about how I am going to pay for everything)
5. Study at an amazing university anywhere in the world

Basically, I just want to work on creative projects all of the time and not have to have a job or anything that takes up my time doing something I don't like. I think we all want to do what we want, when we want, all the time. Of course, that isn't realistic. But it doesn't have to be realistic on this list.

xx Brie

December 21

Stop claiming you are not creative.  If you have thoughts, you are creative.


I never really claim I am not creative.  I mean, I don't go around bragging about it but I think of some good story ideas sometimes.  I cannot do art, though; a recent horrific doodle of a car will be enough proof for you.  I also create disaster in kitchens (I am thinking of a specific mac and cheese incident here).  I think we are all creative in at least one area, no matter what your talents are.  I think you really have to work on your talent, though.
AMANDA

Amanda, your ear/squirrel was a work of art. Don't kid yourself. Our friend Mara is probably the most creative person within a 100 mile radius of where we live. So, that can be pretty intimidating. But, it is just as Amanda said: everyone has at least one creative part to them. For me, I like to be creative with my clothes and sometimes interior decorating. I am in no way a musician, but I love to listen to different types of music, so I think it counts as creative if I express my emotion through music. I think the most important part of being creative is releasing your feelings and expressing your emotions in healthy, productive outlets. We don't all have 'in your face' type talents. It is all about the qualities that make you unique rather than how amazing you can be at something.

xx Brie

December 20

Change for the better even if you are scared of the unknown.


I tried really hard to think of a recent example from my life to write about in this post but I came up with nothing.  I am feeling really sick right now so my headquarters may become my bed.  The nice thing about being sick is you can blame your illness for saying really stupid things (like pronouncing "blotchy" like "blouchy") or not thinking of any examples for your blog post.  Good night and good luck.
AMANDA

Something that has changed in my life recently is that I am in a new relationship. Now, I know new relationships are exciting and all that jazz, but I was/am a little nervous, too. I know that getting to know new people helps us grow as individuals and that relationships are good things. You never know what is going to happen when you become involved with someone else. Sometimes being involved with another person changes you for the better, and sometimes it changes you for the worse. All in all, though, I think it is worth it to take the chance. You might get more than you had ever hoped for.

xx Brie

P.S. I hope you feel better, Amanda :)

December 19

There is always a choice.


Although I think the above message is true, I believe that sometimes the other choices are so absurd that if you are smart, your choices are limited. For instance, I know I can choose to blow off two important meetings tomorrow but I would be totally screwed if I did, so I know I really can't.  I also know that technically I can choose not to watch "Countdown" forty times in a row, but realistically the power of the colors holds me back.  It is all about the balance.
AMANDA

There are two kinds of choices, the way I see it. The kind that lets you follow your heart and the kind that lets you follow your judgement and brain. So, even if you have those choices, can you ever really be happy unless you have followed your heart? I know it would probably be different and more complicated in a real life situation, but I think we should always follow our hearts. That is where I believe true happiness comes from. I also think that if you follow your head rather than your heart, you will be more prone to regrets and those two haunting words: 'what if?'.

xx Brie

P.S. My Dalai Lama daily inspiration calender really captured what I think this blog, and Diana Fletcher's book, is about.

When our self-defeating attitudes, emotions, and conceptions cease, so will the harmful actions arising from them.

December 18

Trust your instincts.  Read The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker.


CHECK!  My mom paid me to read that book because I thought I knew all the techniques and it would just needlessly scare me.  It was actually pretty interesting especially when de Becker talked about threats.  Parts were very disturbing but I think it was worth it.  I also think women should take self defense course at some point in their lives.  I took tae kwon do for two years and I feel safer knowing I could defend myself.  Teach yourself how to fight, and then make sure you never have to.
AMANDA

December 17

Let out your emotions, either by talking about them or by writing about them.


I have always been able to let out my emotions because I have such great friends and family.  Yesterday, my friend Mara and I did some charity work at her church.  We helped load food baskets and presents for people who could not afford them themselves.  We got to talk a lot to each other. It was a very rewarding experience for multiple reasons.  Whenever you want to talk to someone, you don't have to make it an official meeting to discuss emotions.  If you have good enough friends, you can do it any time, any place.
AMANDA

December 16

Get silly.


My sister, my mom, and I get very silly together.  We laugh, we dance, we imitate funny moments, and we have fun.  I think this is very important.  I read a quote once that said "Life is not about weathering the storms, but learning to dance in the rain."  If you are serious all the time, you are going to have a hard time getting through tough times in your life.  My solution for seriousness?  30 Rock and Spongebob.
AMANDA


I am in love with that quote, Amanda! I have been so stressed out about this overwhelming amount of work lately  that I haven't let myself get silly. It is a little late to let loose right now, but tomorrow I will make it a point to have some serious fun. Saturday was a really good day for us. (Us meaning Amanda and I.) We had a movie night with our friend Mara and Amanda's sister, Rachel. We laughed so much and so hard that night. I am so glad I have a group of friends who aren't afraid to look a little silly and get crazy. I second Amanda's seriousness solutions. And I add to that list The Office.

xx Brie

December 15

Don't let your daughter be in an abusive relationship.


Well, I don't have a daughter.  So...this is awkward.  Neither does Brie.  I think you should always look after young women in your life to make sure they don't get involved in dangerous situations.  If any mothers out there want to comment and give better advice than we can (not much of a challenge), feel free!
AMANDA

Well, this post is kind of a bust. I think as women, we instinctively take care of everyone around us (there are exceptions to this, I know). Even though I am the same age as Amanda and our friend, Mara, I always feel a sort of mothering instinct with them. I worry about them when I know they are sad, and I protect them as much as I can. And I'm sorry we couldn't have been any more insightful with this post. To echo what Amanda said, if you have the time to comment and are a mother, please feel free to leave your opinion/advice on today's post.

xx Brie

December 14

Sometimes we are attracted to people who are not good for us.  Learn to avoid potentially dangerous relationships.


I have been attracted to the bad boy every once awhile.  I mean, my tumultuous relationship with Mark Wahlberg is talked about all over the world!  Seriously, though, don't be a mob wife.  They are the most annoying characters in the movie and no one wants to hear about them.
AMANDA

Our friend, Mara, is convinced that I am "into bad boys". I think that it is true, for the most part. Some men who made the list include James Dean, Bob Dylan, and Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker. I recently read an article online about how women aren't attracted to smiling men, but rather, to brooding bad boys. I think this is true to an extent, but my boyfriend smiles all the time, and I think it is adorable! Plus, have you ever seen Ewan McGregor smile? If you don't fall in love with him, check your pulse, because you might be dead.

xx Brie

December 13

If you are friends with someone who talks about other people behind their back, chances are they talk about you.


We pretty much addressed choosing friends carefully in yesterday's post.  I don't really have anything to add.  Brie, what is your list of most epic friendships?  Here's mine; post yours!
1. Samwise Gangee and Frodo Baggins
2. Shawn Spencer and Burton Guster
3. Sherlock Holmes and John Watson
4. Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid
5. Obi One Kenobi and Anikan Skywalker
AMANDA

It is a bit unfair that you got to pick the best ones first!!!! Ugh, I will do my best....

1. Neal Cassady and Jack Kerouac
2. Buzz and Woody from Toy Story
3. Bob Dylan and Allen Ginsberg
4. Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and Hermionie Granger
5. John Lennon and Paul McCartney

Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter... We are so cool.

xx Brie

December 12

Get out of friendships that are negative.  If you don't like the way your friend treats people, end the relationship.


I love my friends.  That may sound like I am stating the obvious, but I know that I have had friends in the past that I kind of tolerated.  I didn't like the way she/he talked to other people but I was stuck with the person so I put up with it.  However, you have already met the charming Ms. Brie who is funny, kind, and thoughtful.  Our other best friend, Mara, is a lot of fun and really smart (maybe some time she will guest speak on this blog).  I know this sounds cliche but I think that you can get through anything with good friends.  Just look at Samwise and Frodo!
AMANDA


Amanda, you are so cool with your Lord of the Rings reference! :) I never really knew what good friends were like until I met Mara and Amanda. They are so understanding and caring, and I had never experienced friends like that before. Before I met Amanda, I had a friend who was really mean to everyone around her. Even me, and I was supposed to be her best friend. Being in that friendship was constantly stressful to me, as I would go back and forth between being who I was (a kind, compassionate person, if I do say so myself) and who she wanted me to be (mean, unfeeling, rude). I often look back on that friendship, and I think about how getting out of that situation and creating my own path was the best thing I could have done.

xx Brie

December 11

Forgive strangers who may be slightly rude to you.


I headbutted two different people last week.  On both occasions, I wheeled around and found really tall men standing behind and I totally whammed them. I would hope that these guys don't think I am a total psycho.  On the other hand, sometimes if someone accidentally slams a door in my face they are on my hit list for eternity.  I should try to me more forgiving.  Tis the season.
AMANDA
In the spirit of niceness, here is a link to a really cool song.  Click here.

I think today's message is one of my favorites so far. I used to let the smallest rude thing fill my day with negativity. I am learning to let go of these things with time. Letting strangers get you down is no way to go through life. Just because someone else is having a bad day does not mean that they have the right or the ability to ruin your day, too. Trust me, it will take some time, but do your best to keep a positive state of mind throughout your day. So many aspects of your life will improve.

xx Brie

December 9

It gets dark earlier this time of year.  Be aware of your surroundings and stay safe.


I am one of those people that gets freaked out if a car so much as passes me.  I feel like I keep myself pretty safe.  I took karate for two years, I have read books on safety (most notably The Gift of Fear), and I have a glare that frightens many a passerby (I killed a fly with my glance once).  Awhile ago we discussed safety so if you want some tips, you can check the earlier post.  Actually, you would have no way of knowing which post because we label them by dates.  That seems like a major flaw...
AMANDA

I have never seen this frightening glance. :) But I have seen a fly wither under her stare. Hehe. I think the usual tips go with this post: never be out alone past dark, don't walk through alleys, etc. Use your common sense and don't get too caught up in the excitement of the holiday season that you end up alone in the dark. It is no wonder that people gain weight in the winter. It seems like nine o'clock at night at five.

xx Brie

December 10

Stay hydrated.


All right, for some reason I have been a huge slug for the last couple of days and I haven't done shit.  I have been holding up the proceedings, for which I apologize.  I did go out into the world yesterday to see New Year's Eve and it was pretty awful.  I made my friend spit out her drink though so it was a plus.  Anyway, about drinking...


I love soda!  I am actually drinking a Coke Zero right now and it is delicious!  Water is so boring. I think coffee is disgusting, though, so at least I am not totally unhealthy.  I would make an effort to drink more water but this post is for December 10 so I don't have to anymore! Yay, chemicals!
AMANDA

Ugh, Amanda! Your words wound me. I try to drink at least six glasses of water a day. (I know you are supposed to drink eight, but they are pretty big glasses.) And I usually have three cups of herbal tea every day. For mornings, I either have coffee (a habit I am trying to break) or green tea with fresh squeezed lemon. For the afternoon I have something called African Red Bush tea, also called rooibos tea. It has so many amazing minerals and benefits for the skin. To end the evening, I like to have a nice cup of Sleepytime green tea. As for sodas, I don't really like to drink them. When I do it upsets my stomach. So even if you are big soda drinker, try to substitute a few sodas a day with water or tea. Before you know it, you will crave water instead of soda.

xx Brie

December 8

Shopping is not for the weak.

I absolutely hate shopping (I hope that doesn't make me weak!).  It is boring, tiring, and just altogether the worst.  I try to avoid it at all costs.  When I have to, I complain the entire time and demand candy (I can be a real treat).  I never understood how anyone could like it; it is mindless and frustrating.  It is a necessary evil, though, especially during the holiday season.  I like to go out to lunch or shop for books in between expeditions to make it easier on myself.  I would recommend the same but usually females enjoy the activity.  Suit yourselves!

AMANDA

I love shopping! Haha. If shopping equals strength, then I am quite a strong woman. This year, though, I am very short on time as far as Christmas shopping goes. My strategy is to online shop when I have the time. Perhaps if I order everything on Amazon.com, everything will come at the same time. If you are heading out to brave the crowds this holiday season, try to choose less busy times to go to the stores. Also, have a game plan in mind before you go. Make a list (as we said a few days ago) so you are focused and don't leave anything out.

xx Brie

December 7

Don't spend too much money just because it is the holidays.

I think we addressed this in a post a couple of days ago, so I will not dwell too long on it.  The only thing I would like to add is that the holidays are approaching quickly, so we should all make sure we are not leaving gift buying to the last minute.  I like to compose a list of presents to get so I don't forget anyone, and then go through every means I can think of to destroy said list.  Actually, I should probably do that now...
AMANDA

I have not made my list yet. Wow, I am so behind. I did, however, already get a gift for my dear friend Amanda. :) If you are buying any gifts online, make sure to place the orders in time to recieve them in the mail. I always wait until the last minute, so this year it is my mission to get all of my shopping done at least a week before Christmas. We'll see how that goes...

xx Brie

December 6

If something is not working for you, change it.  Just because it is tradition to do something a certain way doesn't mean you can't change it if it is bothering you.


Certain uncomfortable situations seem to present themselves often and it always shocks me.  I think to myself: "how could I let this happen again; I already went through this!"  I try to take each experience, however horrific it is, as a learning experience.  Of course, if you let history repeat itself, what was the point of going through it in the first place?  I think a good way to prevent this is to try to figure out what you could do differently next time right after something bad happens.  That way, you are always prepared.  I really should learn to take my own advice!
AMANDA

Sometimes I am so used to tolerating things that I just try to push right through it, the thought of changing the situation or not accepting it never occuring to me. I agree with Amanda; experience is the best teacher. I love Amanda's advice. I put it into practice all of the time. Usually, when I make a mistake I immediately go through the different ways I could have gone about the situation. I find that really prepares me for future situations and helps me learn from my mistakes.

xx Brie

December 5

Think about what you have accomplished, not what you didn't get done.


I love lists (I know this may come as a shock to some) so I am constantly making to do lists, to read lists, and to watch lists.  I rarely get bothered about how much is on the list, though.  I know this is going to sound lame, but I do believe that it is truly about the journey, not the final product.  I didn't start the 1001 lists just to say I finished them, but rather to broaden my mind and experience the greatest works ever produced by the human race.  I do recommend to do lists; nothing like checking off a tiresome task!
AMANDA

I was never a list person. Until I met Amanda. :) Now I make lists all the time! I just love the feeling of crossing off a task and reflecting on a job well done. Today I finished a book, and completed most of my work. Instead of stressing over the couple of things I didn't have time to do, I choose to celebrate and feel proud of the work I did accomplish. Don't sell yourself short. Recognize the effort you put in every day and realize that it is truly amazing how much you are able to accomplish. It's all about changing your way of thinking and cultivating the skill to put a positive spin on everything life throws your way.

xx Brie

December 4

When a person you love loses someone, it is often unclear how to act.  Listen to what the person says they need, not what you think they need.


In my experience, people never know how to act when someone they love is going through grief.  Everyone always seems to want something different.  When I lost my grandfather a couple of weeks ago, I actually wanted to talk about it.  I wanted to talk about him and what a dapper gentleman he was and I wanted to share some memories I had of him.  Of course, most people I talked to wanted to change the subject immediately because they figured I wanted to get my mind off him.  I love the second sentence in this message!
AMANDA

I completely agree that everyone needs something different when they are going through the process of grieving. I, personally, have never lost a close family member, so I can't speak for experience. I am not afraid to talk about my feelings, but I can't really say how I would act if I lost someone very close to me. Usually, when something terrible happens to me I let myself be sad for a while, and then I like to laugh about the problem and do happy things. Everyone grieves in different ways, and it is important to be sensitive and understanding to the feelings of everyone around you.

xx Brie

December 3

You do not have to spend loads of money on peoples' presents.  You can still show someone you love them in cheaper ways.


I know people will probably not believe me when I say this but I would rather get books or movies for a holiday than expensive jewelry.  I always love gifts that you can fun with immediately rather than gifts that are put away to wear or use at a later date.  I also am going to brag and say that I am rather good at getting people gifts that are not that expensive but still thoughtful.  For instance, one time I got my sister a bucket of Starburst.  You read that correctly.  She once said that she wanted a bucket of Starburst (she wasn't serious) and I thought to myself: I can make that happen.  It really was not pricey but it was something really personal that she enjoyed.
AMANDA

I agree, Amanda. I would much rather have a thoughtful gift. I truly believe that it is the thought that counts. Amanda and I already were talking the other day about how I like to get clothes for Christmas, and she doesn't see the point, because she can't use it right away. I like to get clothes because then you get the excitement of wearing new things for a while after Christmas. I like to give people books (of course) and music I think they would like. Years from now, I am more likely to remember thoughtful gestures and happy memories with my family than expensive, thoughtless gifts.

xx Brie

December 2

Plan how you will deal with rude or ignorant comments ahead of time so if any situations arise with relatives, you are ready.


Wow.  I really am stepping into another pair of shoes here with this one since I am usually the one who makes unintentionally rude comments.  Recently one of my uncles starting slamming my generation and told me to "use my brain for once".  He also stated that I had zero experience.  None of these comments were appreciated.  I just kept arguing with him until he tired himself out and then I hid in my bedroom for the remainder of the night.  I think I handled it pretty well; I held my own without being equally offensive (although I did call him a snob; totally justified).  I need to worry more about what comes out of my own mouth than what comes out of other people's.
AMANDA

My relatives and I generally get along very smoothly. There is one instance that I can recall in which a relative started yelling at me from across the room. And it was so unexpected, because I was talking with another relative at a normal speaking level very calmly at the table. I didn't know what to say at all to the yelling relative, so I just took a deep breath and walked into another room. I used that time to clear my head about what had happened, and I sorted through what I wanted to say in response in my mind. I am really proud of how I reacted in that situation, because I was able to stay calm and I avoided saying something I would regret. So, the best advice I could give for unexpected rude comments and situations of the like is to remain calm and, if possible, take a time out before responding. However, I know that is not always possible. If you remain calm so you won't speak with anger.

xx Brie

December 1

Remember that the holidays are fun and loving, not just stress triggers.  Plan some family time and alone time right now. NOW!


This message was a bit pushy, wasn't it?  I cannot speak for my family at this moment!  Anyway, I have never been one of those people who has to "get through" the holidays.  I am not a huge Thanksgiving fan, but I love Christmas and New Year (yes, I am an atheist but Christmas is so commercialized that I celebrate it anyway).  My sister is visiting town for Christmas and I know I am going to spend those days with my family.  This weekend, I am going to see a play with my older brother.  I love spending time with my family; we are all really close.  Yay, December!
AMANDA

My family (and extended family) gets together almost every week, usually on Sundays, so during the holiday season we aren't seeing each other any more than we usually do. I can't help but get a bit stressed at this time of year. I have been overloaded with work recently. And on top of that, I haven't even begun Christmas shopping! I really want to enjoy the holidays this year, so I am just going to have to work around my busy schedule. This weekend I am going to spend time with my best friend, Amanda, and my family. :) I can't wait for it to snow! Having a thick blanket of snow on the ground always reminds me of how magical winter truly is.

xx Brie

November 30

Be yourself.


Well, the message is simple enough.  I think the execution is rather easy too.  Sometimes, I am myself too much.  I am a quiet person, and a sarcastic one at that.  When I am with strangers, I sometimes lurk in corners creepily rather than engage people in conversation.  I also make jokes when I get nervous and when people don't get your sense of humor, this can be quite awkward.  Especially when you are meeting your friend's new boyfriend and start rambling about the threats that ants pose to society.  I think you need to moderate yourself and make sure you are not making others feel uncomfortable.
AMANDA

I think I am almost always myself. Sometimes I am a bit more restrained if I feel uneasy or uncomfortable in a situation. Amanda and I have the exact same sense of humor, so when we are around other people we tend to go into our own little world. Sometimes people think I am 'judgemental' because I am curious about the motives behind their actions, and I am honest with them. But I was always told that honesty is the best policy. Sometimes I don't know when to lie to spare someones feelings. Be yourself at all times, unless you are hurting someone else.

xx Brie

November 29

Make your home a clean and wonderful place to be.


I wouldn't call myself a slob but I am definitely indifferent to certain messes.  Right now, for instance, I have a day old load of laundry in the dryer, a messy bedroom, and a closet that seems to be decreasing in area as I write.  My car stays pretty neat and my bathroom is never dirty, though it is cluttered.  I wouldn't let people intimidate you into changing your lifestyle too much.  If you like clutter, enjoy your clutter (as long as your not one of those creepy hoarders that lives with rats).  I am comfortable with the state of my affairs right now.
AMANDA

I really like to have everything clean and organized around my house. Although I love to organize, I don't mind having a cluttered desk and closet. I know where everything is, so as long as I can find it, everything is fine. I make my home a wonderful place to be by hanging up pictures of my favorite things and things, and I write down inspiring quotes and place those where I can see them daily. I am also partial to candles and plants to give my space a more cozy feel.

This quote is above my desk: "Strive with all your hearts, raise up your voices and shout, until this dark world be filled with light..." -Abdul Baha

xx Brie

November 28

Decide to be happy and decide to be a good friend.


Since we have already covered certain aspects of this message, I decided to go in a different direction.  The author mentions that she felt like her song was "Free to Be You and Me" by Diana Ross. So what does everyone feel like their song is?  Don't worry about being pompous or embarrassing; it can be whatever you want it to be!  Please leave comments!
Mine are:
1. "Make Your Own Kind of Music" by Mama Cass
2. "Elle me Dit" by Mika
3. "Haven't Met You Yet" by Michael Buble
What are yours, Brie?
AMANDA

My song? Hmmmm. Well, "Elle me dit" could also be considered one of my songs! So ditto on that one. There is nothing better than having your own songs that never fail to make you happy. I love to jump around my room singing "Elle Me Dit" and these songs:
1. "Like A Rolling Stone" by Bob Dylan
2. "All I Can See" by Brendan James
3. "Fly Me To The Moon" by Frank Sinatra

I turn up the music really loudly to drown out my terrible singing voice!!! :)

xx Brie

November 27

Cooking can make your entire house feel snug and cozy.  Putting apple cider in a pan can make the whole house smell sweet and autumn-y.


This is the last day of my insane relative visit.  The designated visiting house is filled with sweets, drinks, and left overs.  I think if I cooked anything else this weekend the house would explode.  I am going to cook dinner some time this week though.  And no, this does not mean my usual noodles and goat cheese (that is really tasty)!  I am going to do something different so I will keep you posted.  I am pretty sure they have arrived which means I have to emerge from my hiding place.  Until tomorrow...
AMANDA
P.S. I think I will try lemon curd...

I love the idea of trying a new food, Amanda! I am going to do that, too. :) I really like to burn autumn scented candles to warm the house. By the way, how is your 1001 foods book going? I'm thinking of making a soup some time this week. That way it will have to simmer for a while on the stove, giving the smell and warmth time to fill the house. I will keep you posted!

xx Brie

November 26

When you lose someone you love, realize that you are not the only going through the grief.  Exchange funny anecdotes or memories about the one you have lost.  Laugh.


Okay, so this is a weird coincidence.  I should look ahead in the other messages to see if they continue to tell my future.


When my aunts and mom first heard about my grandpa dying, it was awful.  But then one of my aunts started laughing and remembering stories about my grandfather.  I was thoroughly impressed.  I don't think it is disrespectful at all to laugh.  At my funeral, I hope people will get a kick out of my various wacky antics rather than letting the news destroy them.  My grandpa would want them to be the silly, wild girls they were growing up.
AMANDA
Thank you so much, Brie!  You are one of the kindest people I know!:)

I agree, Amanda, it isn't disrespectful to laugh. I would love nothing more if, at my funeral, my friends and family go around and all tell funny stories about me. I love to laugh most of all, and that is what I would like to be remembered by. I'd like to think that I would react to a family members death by laughing about the good times. I guess you never really know, though; it's always different in the moment. And, Amanda, it is very impressive that your aunt is strong enough to react like that. She sounds like she is in a very good place.

xx Brie
P.S. I had so much fun tonight! I love your family!!!

November 25

Dance to some rock and roll.


Last night, my grandfather died.  He had dementia and Parkinson's so I guess he has been dead for a long time now.  Of course, I don't think the people we love ever really leave us if we still cherish their memories and keep them in our hearts.  It is hard to see my aunts going through this.


So today, I am going to take this message to heart and urge them dance.  I am not going to make them dance if they don't want to but I will dance with them.  Of course, once they actually see me dance, they will regret it but still.  I am going to do whatever I can to cheer them up.
AMANDA

Oh, perfect, I am an expert at today's post, as I do this every day. I know this is very cliche to say, but, Amanda, I am so, so, so sorry. You are one of the strongest women I know. Your aunts are so lucky to have you. Hey, we can dance for your aunts together! They will either be terribly frightened of our awful dancing skills, or they will laugh until their sides hurt. Hopefully the latter.

xx Brie

November 24

Don't over exert yourself during family gatherings.  Breathe deeply, drink plenty of water, and give yourself time alone, even if it is in ten minute increments.


I am writing this post at 9:28 AM.  I woke up and realized someone was in the shower.  All my toiletries are in the bathroom and my book is downstairs.  So I locked the door and am waiting to pounce when the bathroom is available.  HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!


If you over exert yourself during family gatherings, you will grow sullen.  This may be the only time that you see certain relatives, so it is important to be yourself (if you are sullen person, you have nothing to worry about).  I have to remind my mom and sister to do this as well so there are no meltdowns.
AMANDA

I spend a lot of time with my extended family; we are really close. I never really have meltdowns caused by spending too much time with them. However, my immediate family is an entirely different story. I cannot spend too much time with them at once. We don't see eye to eye on most topics, so I can only take them in small doses. I really value my alone time.


On a different note: yes, it is important to really listen to your body, especially at this time of the year. Even though it is 'tradition' to some people to over-eat (is that hyphenated? is it one word?) don't make yourself sick, and, as the tip says at the beginning of the post, drink plenty of water. The dry air during winter can really dry your skin out; stay hydrated!

xx Brie

November 23

Focus on matters that are purely productive and progressive.


So the relatives started to arrive for Thanksgiving weekend today.  This always throws off my schedule and routines but I am going to try my best to update this blog every day.  By the way, Brie, I am really excited to have you on Saturday!


Hobbies are interesting to me.  People that have no hobbies are usually boring.  I even appreciate people who have interest in an activity that repulses me (namely sports) as long as they are doing something.  I think we should learn from our hobbies and they should aid us in our growth.  I am constantly learning from these blogs.  I think my blogs definitely fall under the category of productive and progressive.
AMANDA

I'm so excited!!! And kind of nervous; I don't know what to expect. :)

I would feel kind of hypocritical if I told you to never waste your time doing something not productive. There's this quote from the office : Michael: "When I discovered YouTube I didn't work for five days." I lose myself on YouTube sometimes. I'm really ashamed to admit that. I keep telling myself that I have so many better things to do: work, reading, etc. I am going to cut back on my YouTube time drastically. Watching those videos doesn't benefit me. I'm stretched for time as it it, there is no need for me to further waste my time on such trivial things. Easier said than done....

xx Brie

November 22

The older you get, the more important it is to remain strong and healthy.  Exercise (even small amounts) is important in your physical and emotion well being.


I think it is time I share the boating incident of '11.


My sister and I were in Annecy, France.  It really is a beautiful place; probably my favorite city in France.  We decided to take out a paddle boat out on Lake Annecy (you can get an excellent view of the mountains there).  We then decided to jump into the lake and swim.  I decided to be the brave one and jump in first because we were both hesitant about the temperature of the water.  I jumped in, but my bikini bottom got caught on the pegs so you can imagine how comical that looked.  I ripped my bottoms but got free (with no help from my hysterical sister, thank you very much).  We then swam a little while and decided to leave.  I could not get back on the boat.


At first, I thought it was a simple issue of not positioning myself correctly.  I then realized it was a complete lack of strength.  My sister tried to push me on (I looked tres risible as the French would say).  This failed to work.  Utter panic took over because we had a time limit and I simply could not get back on.  Would I have to swim to shore?  Call for help?  It didn't help that French people were taking pictures and laughing at the spectacle.  My sister finally talked me through it (she is quite possibly the best older sister in the world; don't take that personally, Brie).


Sadly, this is not the most humiliating moment of my life.  I wish it was...


The point of this story was that getting in shape isn't just important to your physical well being but also to ensure that similar embarrassing moments don't happen to you.
AMANDA
P.S.  But oh yeah, Brie!  You tripping up the stairs once was completely humiliating.:)

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic, Amanda. It was embarassing! I don't care what you say. :) And no offense taken. In physical fitness testing in high school, I always scored a '3' on push up tests. A '3'. To this day I have a complete lack of upper body strength. About a year and a half ago I started doing a routine of yoga every day. Since I began yoga my mind has been calmer, I get sick less often and I have much less tension in my muscles. Yoga is very good for toning muscles, which is what most women look for in a workout. It is also very relaxing and centering. In addition, yoga strengthens your core; a strong core improves your balance, thus fewer embarassing falls will occur.

xx Brie

November 21

Be nice to someone for no reason today.  Open the door for a random person, smile at someone, and be kind when you are driving.  Your reward doesn't have to be their thanks; just know that you made a difference in someone's life (even if it is in a tiny way).


This one was hard to remember to do.  I always hold open the door for other people and surprisingly enough, a lot of people do the same.  I did forget to smile at a random person, but I can do that tomorrow.  I have to practice not doing it in a really creepy way.  Finally, I am one of those people who considers it a personal affront to my mother if someone so much as tries to merge in my lane (I think I inherit that from my grandfather: "I could be driving in the Sahara Desert as midnight and I would still get stuck behind all the trucks").  Still, I tried to be as forgiving and kind as I could be.  I also did a bit of charity work today so I have that going for me.
AMANDA
Brie: I am so happy for you!!!!

I constantly have a smile on my face. I've been told that I have a 'Mona Lisa' smile. So I don't have a problem with smiling at people. I am naturally a very friendly person, so I think I make small differences in peoples lives daily. My life has been going so well lately that I have been in an even better mood than normal. I like to call my Grandma and my Aunt as much as I can to remind them that I care about what goes on in their lives and that I am genuinely interested. It's the little things in life... :)

xx Brie

Thanks, girlie! :)

"Let your light shine. Be a source of strength and courage. Share your wisdom. Radiate love." - Wilferd Peterson

November 20

Whenever someone keeps a promise, it is a refreshing relief; you know that you can trust the person in the future.  Always try to keep your promises.  If you don't think you can, don't make a promise in the first place.

Okay, so I did end up looking like a pompous ass yesterday (though I appreciate the compliment Brie!:)).  If any of our readers want to comment on yesterday's post and follow my example, I will be greatly obliged.

I don't think anyone deliberately attempts to break their promises.  Sometimes we forget and sometimes it is completely out of our hands.  I am usually good at keeping my promises to other people but I am less skillful at keeping the promises I make to myself since I am the only one I disappoint.  Today I am going to try to keep promises I make to myself and treat myself like I would a friend.  Unless my friend asks me to work out, in which case, no way in hell.
AMANDA
Brie: I got some relatives to vote on the poll.  Expect an influx of Beatles!!

Amanda, you could never seem pompous! You are one of the most humble people I know.

I think sometimes people are peer-pressured into making promises. They don't want to disappoint anyone, so they make a promise they know they cannot keep. I keep most of the promises I make, and I consciously put efforts towards my commitments I made to others. And, yes, it is so refreshing and a huge relief when someone comes through on their promise. Keeping your promises is the best bet for strengthening and building a relationship or friendship.

Another thing I would like to bring up today is that lately I have been so frustrated with the amount of work I have to do! They say that the journey is the reward, and I believe it. There are just so many other things I would rather be doing. Isn't my life, my journey my own? Can't I do what I want with my time? Unfortunately, no. 
xx Brie

Oh, it's on, Amanda!!! :) Bob Dylan will prevail!

November 19

Women often do not promote themselves in the same way men do.  You can promote yourself professionally without acting like a show off.  Realize and use your own strengths.


I often disregard compliments.  I am never rude about it, though.  For instance, I get told that I am a good writer a lot.  I do really like writing so I always figured people were just being nice so they would not spoil my fun.  This blog is all about change, however, so here we go:


I AM A DAMN GOOD WRITER AND PEOPLE DON'T JUST SAY THAT TO BE NICE!


Well, that was weird.  I am going to start saying that to myself more often.  Brie, do the same thing with a compliment you get often so I don't look like a pompous ass, please (I am taking baby steps here, people!).
AMANDA

I don't know what to say about myself. When people compliment me, they usually say something like "oh, I really like your 'insert article of clothing here'". I tell myself that I am a nice person a lot, though, as a confidence booster. I don't usually pad my ego, because I don't want to turn into a big arrogant jerk. Not that that is what Amanda is doing! Of course not, she is an AMAZING writer, and I love reading her posts every day. I just don't have a specific talent that people point out to me all of the time.

xx Brie

November 18

Not everyone celebrates the same holidays as you or has the same beliefs.  Be open and kind.


This is so weird that this is the post!  Today I overheard a guy say that atheists were "depressed dumb asses".  Depressed, I suppose, because we don't believe in an afterlife and he expects us to be scared and sad all the time about inevitable death.  Dumb asses because ?????. Now, I know that he is ignorant and should not be given a second thought, but I hate even being in the vicinity of someone that rude.  I think even the most open minded people have their prejudices (I have a small thing against the French), but be careful what you say.  Even if you say something in jest, you will (should) instantly regret how ignorant you sound.  The holidays are truly a great time to say something ridiculously stupid in front of large groups of people after having one too many drinks.
The most perfect example of this:

AMANDA

I have a friend who thinks that she is better than everyone else because of her religion. It really makes me angry when she disgregards things that I say as unimportant because she doesn't believe them. When I told her that I was studying Zen Buddhism, she was very skeptical and said in a very snobbish, sarcastic tone "Well, good luck with that." Why can't we all just focus on the similarities of the religions instead of the differences? Think before you speak, and be aware of who else is in your company. Or even better yet, change your way of thinking so you are more accepting of others differences. You will save yourself the trouble of so much conflict, drama, and embarassment.

xx Brie

November 17

Act as though a situation is going exactly according to plan.  This will help you stay in control.


I thought this was a really interesting idea.  I didn't exactly get to use it today because I wasn't caught in a situation that was spiraling out of control.  I also have something to add to this message.  Sometimes, I spend hours stressing over how a certain event or day will go and I can't stop imagining the worst possible scenarios.  I actually think you should imagine the worst case scenario.  Picture it, however ridiculously improbable it may be, then figure out what you do if you were in that situation.  Once you have made a plan, stop thinking about it.  If it crosses you mind again, just say "Oh, I already solved that problem!" and then move on.
AMANDA
P.S.  See, Di?  I am learning!

I think of worst case scenarios, too. But also, another part of me has this, sometimes irrational, hope that the certain event or day will be perfect. I can get my hopes up so easily. It really concurs with the Zen philosophy to have the 'if I don't have any expectations, I won't be disappointed' attitude. I have a really hard time doing this. I really like to plan out different scenarios, as I think I have mentioned before. That way I have some idea of a plan of action if a conflict occurs. In addition, if something unexpected happens, I truly believe that there is something to a woman's intuition. My intuition has not steered me wrong yet!
"Trust yourself and you will know how to live." - Johann Wolfgang van Goethe

xx Brie

November 16

Even if our friendships don't end in the way we would have liked, cherish the good parts.  Don't dwell on what broke you apart but rather what drew you together in the first place.


I will admit, I changed the message.  It originally just focused on friendships with other women.  I actually have never had a friendship with a woman that ended abruptly.  Some have simply faded away, but I never had a big blowout.  I have, however, had that happen with a male friend of mine.  So today I remembered three of the best moments I ever had with him.  It felt wonderful to relive funny memories and to let go of resentments. This might be my favorite message as of yet.
AMANDA

I have had a huge fall out with a female friend in the past. It happened when I was very young and I consider myself to be a completely different person now. I cannot even remember any happy memories with her. It was always somewhat unpleasant to be around her, as we had such different dispositions. I was drawn to her in the first place because she included me in things and I was new to my school. I am going to be thankful for our fight and separation because even though I lost a friend, it feels like I gained so much more. I am entirely convinced that I would not be the person I am today if I was still friends with her. I agree, Amanda, I love this message!

xx Brie

P.S. I wanted to share with you what today's message is for my Dalai Lama inspiration calendar as I really loved it: To be aware of a single shortcoming within oneself is more useful than to be aware of a thousand in somebody else. Rather than speaking badly about people and in ways that will produce friction and unrest in their lives, we should practice a purer perception of them, and when we speak of others, speak of their good qualities.